By the time The Captain comes home at night I am about ready to pull out my hair or have a nervous breakdown- sometimes both. But I am lucky. I have someone that comes home and takes over for a bit. If only to help with the Big One because the Little One only tolerates him for about 10 minutes. That is only because he doesn’t have the goods. I’m the one with the milk. I’m the only one the Little One wants.
Although when The Captain works long hours I sometimes feel like a single mother, I know that at the end of the day I will have help. At the end of the day I am not a single mother. I have someone to get up in the middle of the night when I am so exhausted I can’t hold my head up or keep my eyes open. I have help when the kids are driving me batty and I need a time out. So many other women out there are not so lucky.
I respect the single mother, who is the sole provider for their households. If they are one of the lucky ones they may receive child support payments, but many are late and not the full amount due. Single mothers often work two and three jobs to put food on the table and keep the lights on, sacrificing the time spent with their children.
Single mothers do not have someone to take over when things get crazy. They do not have a “back-up” when they are sick. They do not have someone to lean on when life is hard. What single mothers do have is amazing strength. No matter how hard it gets, they keep on keeping on, for themselves- and more importantly for their children. Many single mothers have figured out (to the best of their ability) to be both mother and father for their children, as in many cases the fathers don’t hang around to help out.
I admire the single mother because of all these things, but mostly because it was a single mother that brought me into this world. It was a woman, who alone, cared for me for the first 8 years of my life. A woman who struggled every day to put food on the table. A woman who was both mom and dad to me for 8 difficult years. My mother didn’t have the luxury of having a back-up when she was sick. She still had to work and care for me no matter what the circumstances.
It took me having my own children to really understand why she was tired when she got home from work. I now know why she was short-tempered at times, and why I couldn’t have the brand name clothes. In the end that’s not what matters. In the end the only thing that matters is that she loved me and she was there for me when my father wasn’t. It took the craziness in my own life to respect all that she went through to make sure that I had what I needed. Every day. And she did it alone.
Were you raised by a single parent? If so, tell them that you love them. Tell them that you know they did their best. Tell them how much you appreciate all they sacrificed for you.
Are you a single parent? If so, know that one day your children will appreciate your sacrifices. They may not understand how difficult it is for you. In their selfish little minds they can only comprehend how it affects them, but one day they will see, and they will love you more for it.
Me and my Single Mother-then
Us Now :)
Love You Mom!