Sunday, May 13, 2012

A Mother's Love

I turned a year old on my mom's first Mother's Day. It was her first of many Mother's Days, some filled with joy and happiness, others with pain and sadness. I love the woman who gave me life deeply and whole heartedly, but our relationship has been difficult at times. It has taken me many years to understand the sacrifices she made and the struggles she endured. I have had to face the silence of an empty home to truly understand the heartache she felt so many days, pain that was magnified on this special day for mothers. I have come to accept the choices she made, but only after having to make my own choices, wondering every day if they were the right ones. I have come to respect her strength, first as a single mother, and then as a mother waiting for her daughter to return.  I was unable to fully comprehend my mother's love, until I held my babies in my arms for the first time. I had to overcome my anger, hurt and selfishness to find love, forgiveness and understanding. Today we are closer than we have ever been.

For me, this day that is designated a celebration of mothers, will forever be bittersweet. I will feel the familiar ache in my heart as I think of the child that made me a mother. As long as miles separate me from the woman that gave me life, I will miss her. And when I pick up the phone to call with Mother's Day wishes, it will be with a heavy heart, as I know the Captain would give anything to be able to do the same. And then I look at these two beautiful girls that are God's gift to me and I am reminded of the beauty of being a mother and of being loved by a mother. I am reminded that a mother's love is timeless and forever lives in the hearts of her children.

I will forever be grateful for the mother that God gave me. The mother who attended every concert, ball game, play or event that I took part in. The mother who raised me up in the church, where I found the faith and love that helped mold me into the person I am today.

I will forever be grateful to the Captain's mother. The woman who raised the man that I love and cherish. The woman who is solely responsible for the kind and caring husband and father he is today. A woman that I have never met, but I know that she watches over my family every day. A woman that I can't wait to meet in Heaven.
Three generations of Moms

And finally I will forever be grateful for all of my children. The girls that bring meaning to my life, love into my heart and laughter to my soul. They are the reason that I truly understand a mother's love.

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